How I Became A Part of Tim's Gift

In 2015 the NC Division of Services for the Blind was helping me with job placement. I had recently graduated from the NC Rehabilitation Center for the Blind to learn how to be a productive citizen in this crazy world in which we live. I did not have much work experience because I was diagnosed with Leukemia when I was 20 years old. I had worked at Sampson Regional Medical Center for a short period of time as a unit secretary while I attended Nursing School. The NCDSB suggested I volunteer to get more experience.

My mom had a friend living in Texas who would visit her grandmother in Clinton occasionally. During one visit she was told to try the tacos at Carolina Tortilla. After expressing their likeness to the authentic Texan tacos, we had to give it a try. While parked, waiting for momma to check the place out, I was facing Tim’s Gift. I asked momma, “What is Tim’s Gift?” She said, “All I know is they help cancer patients”. The bells in my head started ringing! I knew this could be the perfect place for me since I was a cancer survivor.

The next day I gave Tim’s Gift a call. I must have called the Learning Station because Ms. Becky answered sounding frazzled with a lot of commotion in the background. She said Sam had started working on a volunteer committee and she would call back when more information was available. Some time passed with no word from Ms. Becky. I called her back, but our conversation was not very encouraging for getting volunteer work.

I shared with the coordinator at the NCDSB about Tim’s Gift. I did not know it, but the coordinator visited Tim’s Gift. I don’t know much about the visit, so Ms. Becky will share about their time later. To sum it all up, they had a wonderful visit. She told Ms. Becky to give me a chance and she would be glad she did. They had a prayer and the visit ended with tears.

During the summer of 2015 I began volunteering at Tim’s Gift. Now, almost 8 years later I am the office manager, and I have loved every minute. I am so grateful for Ms. Becky for taking the chance and giving me the opportunity to be a part of the nonprofit. It is amazing how we are led to things we are supposed to do. They may not be in your plans, but you may learn you wouldn’t have it any other way. Go with the flow, whether it is good or bad, and you may see it all works out in the end. HE will not lead you wrong!

A WORD FROM BECKY - When Jennifer Brewer called Tim’s Gift in 2015 to inquire about the ministry’s mission and seek employment, I was in awe of her angelic voice but denied her request for a job. Jennifer called again with an even more impressive phone interview; yet, my uncertainty of how she could do the job was another closed door for Jennifer. Refusing to give up, Jennifer called a third time sharing her genuine desire and belief she would be an asset to Tim’s Gift. I promised to call her back! Three weeks later, I hadn’t given her a call back but God was at work in ways that truly got my attention. A lady from the N.C. Blind Association came to Tim’s Gift and introduced herself with a firm handshake and deisre to talk with me about Jennifer. We sat down at the prayer table and her strong case for hiring Jennifer pulled every heartstring with conviction that Jennifer was a divine blessing God was trying His best to send our way. The lady shared how Jennifer excelled in blind school and could do exemplary tasks that would amaze me. Still, I had reservations! My greatest concern was knowing how to help her do the necessary tasks with her being legally blind. The kind woman kept pressing forth with conviction and passion that Jennifer could perform and be a great asset to the ministry. With a heavy weight of making this decision, I asked the lady if we could pray about it. We joined hands at the prayer table and began praying powerfully as two sisters in Christ seeking confirmation about what was the right thing to do for Jennifer and for Tim’s Gift. When we finished praying, tears were trinkling down out cheeks and the Holy Spirit was gently tendering our hearts and filling that place. Oh, how precious is the power of prayer. Feeling strong conviction, I told her we would give Jennifer a chance and see how things worked out. She told a bold step of faith with blessings never expected. She said the Blind Association would make Jennifer’s computer applicable so she could see the screen, provide special paper with bold lines, and pay her salary the first eight weeks. I was in awe for what I never expected, God had in place all along - but I had to step in faith to hire a young girl who had been through tough times with leukemia when a bad cell - from a bone marrow transplant - left her with very little vision. Wow! How great is our God! The lady and I embraced with tears flowing and faith showing. We celebrated the miracle we witnessed after taking to the Lord in prayer our requests for the right decision for Jennifer’s life and Tim’s Gift future plans. When she left, I called Jennifer with good news that she would be an employee with Tim’s Gift Inc. and the rest is history. Her amazing work ethic and sweet spirit is proof that God provides and puts in place what is right and good for our needs as He answers prayers in His perfect timing. Sending Jennifer to TIm’s Gift was a blessing beyond measure I thank Him for every single day as she shines in proficiency, productivity, and precious Christian character through tough and terrific times. Jennifer and I have bonded as sisters in Christ and best friends who hear His Voice, give help and hope to His children, honor and praise Him out loud in love, and look to Him for goodness and guidance as we walk and work by faith…not sight! Jennifer and I are close to our Lord and one another as we serve Him and share happy days together at Tim’s Gift Inc

WHAT IS TIM’S GIFT? When I started working at Tim’s Gift, all I knew was that they helped cancer patients. There are so many people out there that do not know what Tim’s Gift does or only know a little about the nonprofit, and 2023 is its 15th anniversary. Well, Tim’s Gift does so much to help people locally.

First of all, it is a Christian based 501c3 nonprofit. The mission of Tim’s Gift is to assist individuals with medical expenses, as well as, giving medical supplies & lending equipment to those who need them.  If we are unable to fulfill the needs someone is requesting, we always have prayer with them to give them hope, encouragement, and know that they are loved.

Tim’s Gift operates solely on donations from the community. We give out items such as wheelchairs, walkers, boost/ensure, wound care items, bed pads, depends, bandages, etc. The only thing we ask is to return the equipment when   no longer needed. That way, it can be passed on to the next person who needs the items. If you have any of these items lying around, please send them our way.

Tim’s Gift doesn’t receive any grants or government funding. It is important that our supporters continue to show their love with monetary donations. Your donations allow us to continue helping more individuals and families fighting cancer or other medical illnesses. Make a donation by clicking the donate button on our website or Tim’s Gift Inc Facebook page, mailing to 108 NE Blvd, Clinton, NC 28328, or bringing  it to Tim’s Gift. You may also become a monthly donor. No amount is too small! Thank you to all who give in any way from volunteering to giving supplies, equipment, and financially.

Blind School

My last blog took us back to 2012. Today I will be talking about what happened in 2014. I don’t remember anything specific that happened in the time period between my cataract surgery and mid- 2014, but I probably had at least one hospital stay. I do remember staying at home was getting old and boring.  I wasn’t driving because of my vision, I was doing a daily IV medication, and I was frequently going to Dr. appointments. Getting a job was unrealistic, and besides, what could I do with limited vision? Isn’t that what everyone thinks?  I surely thought that!

 Sometime in 2014 I received a mailing regarding a back to work program NC offered. One of those programs included a vocational rehab through the North Carolina Division of Services for the Blind. I didn’t know there was a such place and after a little research, I gave them a call. Not long afterwards, I was talking with a representative face to face. We discussed all the options the NC Services for the Blind offered a visually impaired person. I was surprised because I had no idea this was available. After further talking, I made the decision to attend the NC Rehabilitation Center for the Blind. It was not a hard decision to say yes to attend the program, but it was scary to know I would be alone at a place I had never been. Yes, there were going to be other people there, but they were not going to be guiding me and walking with me telling me what to do and where to go. It was going to be all me, doing it all for myself.

 The Rehabilitation Center is held on the campus of the NC School for the Blind in Raleigh. This is a flexible 16-week program for people who have lost their vision later in life. Students in the program ranged from 20 years old to older adults in their 70’s. Most had lost their vision due to Diabetes, but there were many other reasons as well.  One person that I still talk to today, lost all of his vision after being shot in the temple. The Rehab Center offered 2 program tracks, one to prepare you for work and the other to prepare you for college. Since I had already graduated college, I took the track to prepare for a job.

 I stayed on campus in a dorm room. Upon arrival on the first day, I was shown around the campus to get familiar with the layout and location of each building I would be frequenting. The rehab center’s portion of the campus was separate from the NC School for the Blind although we did share the cafeteria. We usually went at a different time and ate in a separate room.

 My day started with breakfast then I headed to class. Each student had their own class schedule. In both tracks a test was given to determine our education level. They offered all the basic education classes as well as computer, brail, mobility, cooking, everyday living classes, and more. All of these classes specifically taught the visually impaired how to function in those areas. The teachers taught us tips and tricks to do many things. In the computer class, we were taught computer programs that allow the user to operate the computer with the keyboard and different key functions enabling the computer to read the content aloud. It was truly enlightening. I never knew there were so many possibilities for the blind. In my cooking class we were taught how to cook using assistive gadgets and tricks. Simple things such as a meat thermometer that speaks the temperature or a gadget that sits atop a mug beeping when the cup is full of liquid. If you have vision, you do not think about pouring hot coffee and knowing when the cup is full. In my everyday living class, we were taught tricks like putting a rubber band around the shampoo bottle to feel the difference between shampoo and conditioner. Here is a trick for you. You know how difficult it is to figure out the right way to put on a fitted sheet? What about when you can not see what you are doing? I could turn that sheet all day searching for the short side. The trick I learned, put a safety pin in the middle of the elastic in the foot of the sheet. The next time you put your sheets on the bed simply feel for the safety pin and you will immediately know how to place the fitted sheet. Classes ended at 3 and we could do whatever we wanted afterwards. The Rehab Center had a Recreational Therapist that came in at that time. It was part of our learning as well. The rehab therapist would do different activities with us such as gym and arts and crafts. Once a week we would go to Walmart to pick up things we needed, while at the same time, it was teaching us how to be independent and make in store purchases. We would also go bowling. Did you know a blind person could bowl? Didn’t know it, but they had a rail you could follow with your hand. When you reached the end of the rail it was time to roll the bowling ball. I could see enough that I did not need the rail, but it was awesome that someone who couldn’t see at all was able to participate in an activity with the sighted that seemed impossible. My fellow classmates and I would take a cab out to eat dinner some nights.  We had a good time. It made me realize a visually impaired person did not have to be confined to their house, or have their “person” with them at all times.

 The most challenging class I took was the mobility class. The instructor told me it was harder to teach someone with partial vision to use the blind cane. She said they wanted to depend on what little vision they had rather than using the cane to tell them what was ahead. Well, that was me. It is hard to walk confidently with a blind cane while trying to see what is around when you can’t really see what is around you. Depending completely on the blind cane to tell you where to walk is unsettling. It took me a long time to become comfortable using one. This is a one-on-one class with the student and instructor. I started out around the campus walking on different surfaces and going up and down steps. Some days we would walk across the street to Pullen Park. Part of the training was learning to cross the street. Eventually we went to downtown Raleigh and learned how to cross the street using the crosswalk button at stoplights. We also rode a bus, went to the mall to learn to use an escalator, and so much more. These are simple things a well sighted person can do without thought, you do not think about how challenging it can be for others. It is similar to a person in a wheelchair, the wheelchair doesn’t stop them from doing everything, they just have to learn new ways to do them.

 While out on the Blind School campus I would see other instructors teach their students to use the blind cane. I remember seeing a little boy that looked like he was in kindergarten or first grade running down the sidewalk with the blind cane. I was walking extremely slow taking baby steps scared I was going to walk in to something or fall off of a 50-foot ledge, and he wasn’t afraid of anything. He had his little blind cane and was all over the place. I just watched him thinking to myself, I want to be like him.

 I have seen a lot of comics and jokes online with blind people using smartphones. The joke is on them. A smartphone is extremely useful to the visually impaired. First of all, it can read everything aloud. Secondly, you can speak commands into the phone. Also, there are apps on the phone that will read documents, handwriting, tell you colors, dollar amounts, facial recognition, and so much more. Another amazing thing a phone will do is tell you cooking instructions, ingredients, and other information about a packaged item when you scan its barcode. I had one class that only taught the benefits of a smart phone for the visually impaired. I would never have known all of this if this program was not available. Technology is not the only way to accomplish tasks. I was shown other assistive tools, such as bold line paper so I didn’t write diagonally over other words. They also provided 20/20 pens that write bold enough for me to see what is written.

 Once my instructors and I felt like I had achieved the goals of each class, I was able to move on to another one. The mobility class was definitely the one I stayed in the longest. After about 6 months, in 2015, I graduated from the NC Rehabilitation Center for the Blind. One of the classes I took was a career class that helped with job interviews, job searches, applications, and resumes. After graduation it was my responsibility to follow up with any opportunities and continue the search. I met again with the NC Division of Services for the Blind. They worked with me to find a job, which can be difficult for a visually impaired person.  Just like me, before I entered the Rehab program, most wonder what a blind person is capable of doing. I learned in the program that anything is possible. Sometimes Technology can be difficult to use and unnecessary, but for the visually impaired it makes so many things possible. Right now, while writing this article, the computer is reading every letter aloud as I am typing. It is even telling me if I have misspellings or have a grammar error.

 I hope this article gives you a different perspective on people who are at a disadvantage for whatever reason. Maybe you have a disability or injury.  Let this open your eyes and heart to the possibility that there may be more out there for you. If you are looking at someone that is at a disadvantage, don’t close your mind to what they are capable of doing. Assist them if needed, but watch them accomplish more than what you may think is possible.

 While working with the Division of Services for the Blind they helped me with job placement. It was after I graduated the program that Tim’s Gift was shown to me. Stay tuned for the next article to learn how I became part of Tim’s Gift.

From ICU to I See You Better

2012 brought along unexpected mishaps such as another central line infection causing my first ICU admission. You can read about that in my previous blog. I also chose and scheduled a procedure during 2012. As I have mentioned, after bone marrow transplant, I was given many months of high dose steroids. Prednisone is a wonderful medication used to control Graft vs Host Disease (GVHD) after bone marrow transplant, but long-term high dose use can have negative side effects. By 2012 my bones in my hips and ankles are destroyed from the Prednisone, and now my eyes are showing the effects of steroid use. While seeing multiple eye doctors for my vision loss, one thing they find is cataracts. Cataracts are one of the nasty possible side effects from long term use of high doses of Prednisone.

 I had known for years that I had cataracts, one in each eye, but I did not want to have them removed. As a younger patient, cataract surgery results are a little different. When the eyeball ages to around 40+ years old, it changes shape causing close up vision to start diminishing. Around that age a person may notice they need reading glasses.  A younger eye has not naturally changed shapes yet and the near vision is usually clear. Having cataract surgery at 29 years old would cause a decline in my reading vision. An older eye may notice improvement in close up vision after cataract surgery.

 During cataract surgery the natural lens is removed and replaced with a man-made lens. A natural lens automatically adjusts for near and distant sight allowing you to see clearly at all ranges naturally. Once you have cataract surgery and an artificial lens is placed, there is no natural adjustment to the lens. For me, I knew once I had the surgery, I would require reading glasses. Although I’m legally blind, the small portion I can see is pretty clear, and I did not worry about the inconvenience of having to use reading glasses. I know many people use them, but most of the time it is due to aging. My dilemma was, did I want to continue with my small field of vision being foggy, or did I want to see clearly with the use of glasses for reading and for distance? Because of my extremely small field of vision, bifocals were out of the question.

 After much debate with myself, I finally made the decision to have the surgery. With my doctor’s advice and thoughts, we chose which eye to do first and I finally opted for distance vision lens and reading glasses. Cataract surgery is a very common surgery. The doctor said if everyone lived long enough everyone would have cataracts.

 The procedure went well and I could tell a big difference in that eye, but the remaining cataract still affected my vision as a whole. After a couple of days everything felt fine, but for a 2-week period I couldn’t lift or bend over. I did not realize how often I did those two things until I was told not to.

 A couple of months later I could tell that colors were brighter and the fogginess was gone in my operative eye; however, my near vision was not clear. With my other eye still having its natural lens, it compensated for the difference, so I did not have to wear reading glasses. I decided at that time that I would not have the second eye surgery. Eight years later, in 2020, I did give in and have my second cataract removed. Now I am carrying reading glasses everywhere I go and have them sitting beside my chair at home. Just another one of my old lady checkmarks. LOL!

 Sometimes you just have to take things that come your way lightly and laugh at yourself. I tell myself all the time, “somebody somewhere is doing way worse than me”. Love life, yourself, and be thankful for what you do have.

Wake Up ICU

2012 was another year packed with medical issues. I have mentioned the Hickman IV line I had in my chest, but I have not talked about the problems they can cause. In 2003, the day after I was admitted into UNC, I had a Hickman placed. It is a central line inserted into the chest, goes under the skin, around the clavicle, and into a large vein that goes to the heart. It differs from a port because the Hickman is always hanging out of the chest. A port is a box under the skin that a large needle is placed into with the IV line attached. The needle can be removed and replaced as needed. The particular Hickman I had was one large catheter coming out of my chest that divided into three different lines so that multiple medications could be given at once. I remember at times having multiple IV pumps on one pole beside me with several different medications on each pump, and an IV line going to all three lines of my Hickman.

 It was aggravating having the central line, but it was a life saver. I had all my lab work drawn from the line and I was given all of my meds through it. I never had to get stuck for blood or an IV except on certain occasions. Special care had to be taken to prevent infection. Keeping it clean was very important. Three days a week the dressing had to be changed, and the lines had to be flushed to prevent clotting. In the hospital, the nurses took care of it, but at home my mom and I had to do it. The Hickman could not get wet, especially in a pool or the ocean. I did get it wet in my shower, but I did not soak it and momma changed the dressing as soon as I got out.

 I learned a really big lesson once after going to Myrtle Beach. I was sitting next to the water. I did not think I was getting my chest wet, but a couple of days later I began running a fever. After BMT any fever over 101 was reason to go to the hospital. My mom and I packed our bags and headed to UNC. The first thing the nurses do is draw blood cultures from your line and from your arm. After 2-3 days the results from the blood cultures should be complete. Hopefully, if bacteria grow, they can identify what it is and the best antibiotic for treatment. Well, this particular time an odd bacteria grew. It was determined the bacteria came from the ocean and usually only dogs had. My family picked on me and said they should have taken me to the veterinarian. WOOF! WOOF!

 Bacteria can enter the body through the central line and cause quite an infection in the blood. When this would happen, my line would need to be removed, and IV antibiotics had to be given. When the bacteria   cleared and the doctors felt it was safe, a new line could be placed. Bacteria can stick to the plastic of a central line even after antibiotics are given. The infection is in your blood and can be deadly if not treated promptly and correctly. I have had so many lines placed in my chest I have lost count. Each time they would switch sides to the left or right chest. Having a Hickman removed is not a surgical procedure. I remember three things during this entire process that were the most painful and most horrible experiences ever. One I have mentioned before was the second fibular graft hip surgery I had when the doctors had to turn off all pain meds and my epidural after my blood pressure dropped to a dangerous level during surgery. I woke up in so much pain and it was several hours later before they were able to administer any medications into my epidural again.

 The first memorable extremely painful thing I remember is when I had my first Hickman removed. The doctor came into my hospital room for what he thought would be a simple procedure. I had never had this done so I was nervous. The doctor was a resident and evidently had not performed this procedure many times. He did not give me any premeds because this was going to be a “quick, simple” procedure. He approached my bedside, positioned me like he wanted, and explained what was going to take place. When doctors place the Hickman, stitches are placed around the catheter where the line enters the chest to secure. After time the stitches grow out and your skin attaches to the line at that point. Under the skin, several inches above the insertion point, there is a cuff. The small cuff is around the line, and the tissue under the chest attaches to help hold the line securely in place. Well, this doctor sets up his tools on the bedside table and starts injecting the Lidocaine to numb the area. He takes his scissors and starts cutting the skin loose from around the line at the insertion point of my chest. The doctor gives it a gentle tug and nothing happens. He takes the scissors and cuts a little more followed by another gentle tug. An hour later he is sweating, mom is pacing back and forth, and I am trying not to squirm, gripping the sheets, and clenching my toes. At this point, he is shoving the scissors under my skin and up my chest several inches, parallel to the line, trying to cut the cuff loose where the tissue had attached. Finally, he separated it and pulled the Hickman out. Mom followed him out of the room. He told her that was the hardest line he had ever tried to remove. For me it was torture. Later an experienced doctor told me that if you press and massage the chest wall over the cuff, the cuff will detach from the line. Then the Hickman can be pulled easily through the cuff. The cuff stays but it causes no harm.

 That incident was in 2003. After several noneventful line replacements, the one in 2012 was too eventful.   I had another bacterial infection in my Hickman and it was removed. I went into the operating room about a week later to have a new one placed. I had had this procedure many times so I was familiar and not worried at all. The anesthesiologist gives you a little sedation and pain meds during the surgery, usually, I was asleep the entire time. This particular time, thankfully, I woke up. I woke up and I couldn’t breathe. I told the doctor and the next thing I new I was waking up in ICU. After nine years of lots of hospital stays and almost death, this was my first ICU admission. One of the risks of having this procedure was an itsy-bitsy chance of a pneumothorax. Well, of course, that happened to me. The doctor had punctured my lung and it collapsed. Needless to say, he was unable to place the new Hickman. For several weeks I had to sleep sitting up and it hurt to breathe for a long period of time. After I had recovered from the collapsed lung, I went back into the operating room for a new Hickman. I was a little uneasy going in that time, but I knew I could not worry about what could happen.

 You can’t go through life worrying about what could happen or what has happened. Doing so will leave no room for the happiness in between.  Worry will take over your joy, not to mention, you will also make everyone around you miserable. Do what you can to make sure things go smoothly. The next time I had surgery to place a new Hickman, I made sure the doctor was aware of what had happened in the past. Be an advocate for yourself. You are not stepping on anyone’s toes or hurting their feelings by standing up for yourself. When you make it over the bumps in the road it only makes you stronger. Say a prayer and give it to God.